brother

Every night and every morn
Some to misery are born.
Every morn and every night
Some are born to sweet delight.

Some are born to sweet delight,
Some are born to endless night.

William Blake
(Auguries of Innocence)

I think you were among the latter. And I hope wandering shards of light did penetrate the long night here and there, now and then. And I pray that the final night took you in like a lost babe. Rest in peace.