lost page from hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy

General Classification: Earthling

Specifications: Male specimen of Planet Earth's dominant species, namely, Homo Sapiens (Yup, they still copulate to reproduce, how charmingly retro)

Type: Biped, opposable thumb, vertical spine

Evolutionary Stage: Preliminary, largely physical

Noteworthy: Early tool making (especially crude weaponry), aggressive war-like tendencies (especially in males), despite the marked absence of claws and/or canines

Sensory Faculties: Limited to the first 3 dimensions

Communication: Language-dependent, intra-species only

Temporal Flow Perception: Unidirectional

Ego: Uni-personal

Telekinesis: Nil

Telepathy: Sparse, unconscious

Empathy: In traces

Overall Assessment: Faintly hopeful (despite the above, owing to minuscule traces of a singular higher faculty, namely, humour)